>Use STUDFINDER on all walls to determine structural weaknesses of the room.

You pass the STUDFINDER over all the walls. You pass it uneventfully over the false door, the north wall with the unlocked safe, the hidden shameful poster and the curious grate, and even over the wall with your Colombina, and your Magician And Lovely Assistant portrait.

The Colombina was a recent gift from your dear friend Calliope. She said that she'd seen you standing in front of it in a dream, so she had to get one for you! What an enchanting concept. You simply must remember to take a selfie in front of it sometime and send it her way. It would sure be fun to make her dream come true!

The Magician And Lovely Assistant portrait is a promo shot for a live appearance you did this year. You have hung it here to commemorate the event, but you are not at all pleased with how it came out. If you knew what a Wojak was, you would probably think, Ew, this makes me look like a freaking Wojak! And then feel the appropriate level of disgust.

Anyway, for all your studfinding, you hear nary a beep. No room is impenetrable. There must be structural weak spots somewhere. Maybe you should use the studfinder in a more specific spot.

>Use MAGIC WAND to summon your phone here.