>Heal the everliving shit out of that shitty little mephit.

Oh what? This little dude is tapping away at YOUR cell phone! That must have been what that click-clicking noise was that kept you anchored to reality during the peak of your alcohol delirium.

While they've always been a frequent sight in the land of the dead, lately monsters have been becoming an increasingly common nuisance on Earth C. Some of the more evolved monsters, or, gods and goddesses forbid, the terrifying glitched-out ones found in the Great Shale Wastes, can be genuinely dangerous. However, the ones found near civilization seem to be about as weak as the Sburb imps they archetypally resemble, and as such aren't good for much except causing havoc, being a thing under the bed that scares children sometimes, and swiping sought-after items.

You'll heal this dude, all right. You'll heal his ass up good. After you KICK IT!!

>Use BATTLESPORK to punish arrant thief!!